


Tomorrow

by Lucy410



Category: Star Trek: Enterprise
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-11
Updated: 2017-10-14
Packaged: 2019-01-16 01:24:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12332673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lucy410/pseuds/Lucy410
Summary: Jon has made a decision





	1. Jon

I’m lying awake purely for the pleasure of watching him sleep. He sighs and rolls over, his eyelids flickering, I wish I could see his dreams. 

I know what I have to do, the thought intrudes and I want to shake my head in denial but I can’t risk waking Malcolm. This thing between us, this marvellous, extraordinary, wonderful thing, which fills my heart with joy, is good for me but I have come to realise that it is bad for the ship. The realisation has been growing for days now but I haven’t allowed myself to think about it. Now I realise I have to.

Yesterday I should have given an order but I hesitated. I hesitated because of Malcolm. T'pol glanced at me and then gave the order herself. I turned and ran with the others while Malcolm and the crewman with him covered us. But I hated myself for leaving him and now I hate myself more because I know what I have to do, I can’t be in that situation again.

I made the decision yesterday while the shuttlepod carried us back to Enterprise and I meant to tell Malcolm then but later, once the dust had settled, he came to me with his warm smile and his eyes full of love and the words wouldn’t come.

But I’m resolved this time, I will tell him when he wakes up.

Decision made I relax a little, settle back on the pillows only to find Malcolm has woken and is gazing at me.

"Love?"

A one word question that drives away all my previous resolve. 

Tomorrow, I promise myself as I bend my head to kiss him, I will tell him tomorrow.


	2. Malcolm

I can see it in his eyes the moment that I open mine and it brings me awake in an instant.

"Love?" The query only deepens the frown on his face and I know he's hiding something from me. Jon has never been any good at concealing his emotions, not from me anyway. I am going to say something else but then he kisses me and what happens next drives all thoughts from my mind.

The next time I wake I’m alone, apart from Porthos of course. He looks at me hopefully and I reach out to ruffle his fur. I never had a pet when I was growing up and I am constantly surprised by how much I enjoy having him around. He jumps up onto the bed and despite knowing that Jon will frown at me for doing so, I shift to one side so that he can get comfortable.

The memory of the look on Jon’s face before he realised I was awake comes back to me, it niggles at me now relentlessly and something, some spark of intuition tells me that it doesn’t bode well for our relationship.

Two days ago he seemed happy, content and I admit that I enjoy the warm feeling that I get knowing that his happiness is because of me. Now I sense that happiness is waning and I think that’s my fault too. Something happened two days ago and now I’m losing him.

I know why of course. I just don’t want to think about it. I expected the order; it was, in the circumstances, the only course of action. Protecting Jon, protecting the crew is part of my job and it’s a role I’m happy with.

But Jon hesitated, I saw the regret in his eyes when he looked at me and I knew he was second-guessing himself. The memory of it has driven him from our bed and makes me wonder if this will indeed be our bed for much longer.

We should talk about it; I don’t want him to feel that he has to make this decision on his own. But I am reluctant to do anything that might end our relationship. Perhaps I’ll talk to him tomorrow.


End file.
